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The ESG&EC proudly endorses the following products and services for their professional, nutritional, therapeutic and social cohesion values ...
Newtown's final home game of the season against the Newcastle Knights doubles as the Jets (and Bluebags) official reunion day.
A dwindling number of the stars from the 60's, 70's and 80's will be there - or at least those who:
a) reside in a nursing home with a courtesy bus;
b) nearing the end of their custodial sentence, have been granted weekend release; and/or
c) are still on the run from authorities.
The ESG&EC is always well represented at this annual gathering, meeting at hipster heaven, the Henson Park Hotel (pictured), for a pre-game aperitif and watching the match (3pm kick-off) from the Lee Harvey Oswald grassy knoll adjacent to the King George V Memorial Grandstand and kiosk.
If you want to catch up before, during or after the game, let me know and we'll get it organised.
Beercoin's listed price is underpinned by the cost of a schooner (425ml) of Resch's served in the public bar of The Entrance Hotel during the World Series of Golf (1 schooner = 1 Beercoin). In the 12 months to May 2019, Beercoin's market capitalisation rose 4.5% to $1,035. Hover or tap Beercoin image to enlarge.
When matters aren't going the way you envisaged, a member can turn to the Earlwood Social Golf & Euchre Club for "guidance" and a deferred donation in the form of a bequest guarantees a greater level and wider range of discreet and effective assistance.
Cutting through "red tape" requires access, influence and co-operation at all levels of government and your bequest is essential to ensuring our voice is heard in the corridors of power. Your continued success has always been our goal and it is only with your committed financial support that the ESG&EC can move forward greasing the wheels of government with impunity. And remember, it's only a rort if you're not involved.
The golf and euchre tournaments that we've created as a benign front for our ambitious aim of world sporting domination, in conjunction with 1. two new companies we've incorporated in the Cayman Islands, are the building blocks for a more covertly influential and wealthier organisation, similar to the Liberal Party aligned 2. North Sydney Forum.
1. Yamba Charitable Works Fund No.1 (Charity Begins At Home) and Davidson Love Glorious Foundation
2. Unlike the NSF's relationship with ex-treasurer Joe Hockey, philanthropic members can gain one-on-one access to President Love to discuss discretionary club matters such as handicaps, partner draws, tournament formats and start dates. Money has always been the language of Love so before your audience with the great man, leave your gift inside a brown paper bag with his receptionist
Well you can't take it with you when you're "brown bread"!! A bequest is the only way to ensure your estate goes to the people who have supported you throughout your membership and it represents just a small return on time and money the club has freely and generously invested in your golf and euchre experiences.
The future of the ESG&EC, and just as importantly it's executive team, is dependent on income from membership, broadcast rights, sponsors and tournament ticket sales and tapping into the wealth of our aging membership complements these revenue streams.
Please consider the following options for your bequest:
Leaving a bequest to any of the 3. ESG&EC entities is an easy and fiscally responsible way to allow the club to continue the fun times long after you've been forgotten. Because your will is a legal document, on a pro bono basis we'll refer you to an independent 4. ESG&EC approved solicitor who'll assist in drafting your will, nominating the club President as your executor and the ESG&EC as a beneficiary. These simple and convenient steps will ensure that when you finally toss tails, your wishes will be carried out to the letter.
There are four main ways to leave a bequest to the ESG&EC:
3. Earlwood Social Golf & Euchre Club LLC, ESG&EC World Series of Golf Pty Ltd, ESG&EC Match Play Championship Inc., ESG&EC World Series of Euchre Trust, ESG&EC NRL Tipping Ponzi No.1, Smoke Da Greyhound Syndicate Ponzi No.2, Yamba Charitable Works Fund No.1 (Charity Begins At Home) and Davidson Love Glorious Foundation
4. ESG&EC approved solicitors are available in the Sydney CBD (Ford Funk Law), Morisset & Five Dock (Tack Nicklaus & Associates) and Drummoyne (Java Haas & Youse)
There is likely to be a selfish group of people who wouldn't want to see you share your wealth with the ESG&EC. This rapacious bunch of ingrates won't be content with having mooched off you for all these years, frittering away your hard earned left, right and centre on uncomfortable fashion shoes, must-have dresses and camp hair stylists.
When you're gone, they'll want it all! In the current political climate, these people are "leaners" and don't deserve to share in your largesse.