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Fatcat's NRL Tipping Ponzi Scheme No.1
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Works Fund No.1
(Charity Begins At Home)
Brewer by Appointment
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Beercoin's listed price is underpinned by the cost of a schooner (425ml) of Resch's served in the public bar of The Entrance Hotel during the World Series of Golf (1 schooner = 1 Beercoin). In the 12 months to May 2019, Beercoin's market capitalisation rose 4.5% to $1,035. Hover or tap Beercoin image to enlarge.
March 16. The ESG&EC and Fatcat can provide the following update about their response to the COVID-19 pandemic and it's impact on current and future competitions. Both stressed that given the fluidity of the situation, all options remain on the table and they will continue to act on expert advice, with the health and safety of tipsters and golfers their paramount consideration.
ESG&EC President Davidson Love III has commissioned Professor Dick Faldo, a biosecurity and pandemic expert, to determine best practices to minimise the risk of participants being infected with the virus. The good Professor, the senior researcher at the world renowned Shearman Institute, immediately recommended all tipsters and golfers drink at least 6 schooners of Resch's draught on weekdays and plenty more on weekends.
"The medicinal qualities of a tall, cold glass of Resch's are universally recognised in the scientific community. It's known to cure chronic abscesses, tuberculosis, cholera, 'female complaints', mercurial eruptions, paralysis and even restore life in the event of sudden death so this virus should be a piece of piss. Unfortunately, for many of us, it's not a panacea for hair loss."
March 16. In respect of Fatcat's NRL tipping competition, "A Competition With A Difference", it will continue in Round 2 with the competition now closed to the general public as a preventative measure. Along with the NZ Warriors, Fatcat will relocate to Kingscliff for at least the next week however he won't be joining the Warriors at the Kingscliff Backpackers - he'll stay at the Balé complex in the Salt Beach precinct to work on the tipping competition and his suntan.
"The ESG&EC will continue to examine short and long term options to assist our golfers if May's World Series of Golf is abandoned. We would be willing to close the courses to spectators if that meant the event could go ahead. The cancellation of our most profitable event would also have catastrophic consequences not only for club's balance sheet but also for the NSW Central Coast economy. If that happened, we would be forced to seek Federal Government financial assistance," said President Love.
"I can’t stress enough that our club has never faced such challenges ... well not recently, not unless you count the Turd Round (see below) befoulment of Toukley golf course's pristine waterways last year and the subsequent unsuccessful prosecution of the club by the Environmental Protection Authority. Like then, we will do everything we can to keep our participants healthy, out of jail and our competitions strong. Frankly, an Australia without Fatcat's 'A Competition With A Difference' and the World Series of Golf is not an Australia I want to live in."
March 4. Sensing a lack of leadership aboard Royal Caribbean's Ovation of the Seas, Davidson Love and Seve Hemosteros filled the vacuum, took charge of the ship and appointed themselves roving medical wardens.
Pictured in their hazmat suits patrolling the corridors, within days of leaving Sydney the enthusiastic pair, dubbed Virus Busters by the crew, had disembarked to the lifeboats mid-ocean 327 passengers who displayed mild coronavirus symptons.
"Getting a table in the dining rooms or a seat at bingo is a lot easier now and there's still 7 days left to clear a few more passengers," said Mr Hemosteros.
February 6. Former Lewisham dux, Iditarod dog sled racer (pictured) and grand raconteur Glenn "Finn" Findlay will be stopping over in Sydney for just a few days later this month before heading north to sail The Whitsundays where he'll be scouting locations for the 2021 America's Cup.
His sole Sydney public appearance will be at Engadine Bowling Club's in the round bar, Friday February 21, from 3pm onwards where he'll perform a number of cabaret classics ("I Still Call Turton Avenue Home", "Tenterfield Musher" and a personal favourite "Quiet Please, There's A Lady Onstage" from his critically acclaimed and autobiographical Broadway musical, "The Lad from Oz".
Tickets can be purchased at the front desk when you sign in.
January 28. The week long sporting and cultural extravaganza, incorporating two sanctioned World Series events, will commence on Monday, May 18.
The club is anticipating around 16 starters for WSofG XXXII with the following venues now booked - Gosford (Monday), Wyong (Tuesday), Toukley (Thursday) and Shelly Beach (Friday).
Prospective Costa Plenti Estate residents are required to send their $200 accommodation deposit, half of which is non-refundable, to President Love's Cayman Island account by Friday, February 7 (details provided in group email January 26). The cost of a bed on the estate is expected to be $400 with the balance, once confirmed, payable early May.
The tournament entry fee is $450 and should also be preferably paid prior to the tour.
November 24, 2019. The club has released it's latest audited post-tournament accounts.
Balance Pre Match Play - $2,854.82
MP Revenue - $1,900 (17 players + 4 guests)
MP Expenses - $2,457.70 (green fees 1082, milestones 100, prizemoney 700, hospitality 575.70)
Tournament Loss - $557.70
Balance Post Match Play - $2,297.12
Davidson Love III
Club President & Auditor
August 5, 2019. The club received news this morning of the sudden death of UK-based tipster and past ESG&EC member Gary Phillips. Gaz suffered a heart attack during a social cricket match and was unable to be revived.
This is a very recent photo of Gaz (middle) borrowed from the Pudsey St Lawrence Cricket Club website (hover or tap image to enlarge). He's with brother-in-law John McGovern (hat), his niece Frances and sister, Lyn McGovern.
Our deepest condolences to Tracy and Liam on the loss of a loving husband and father and to all his family and friends.
Vale Gaz - a great friend to many on these shores.