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The ESG&EC, in conjunction with card master Per-Ulrik Fatcatsson (B.Eu), Dean of Trumps at the prestigious Earlwood Euchre University (EEU), safeguard the rules, traditions, etiquette and professional standards of the game of Earlwood Euchre. The two are joint authors of the game's bibles, Rules of Earlwood Euchre and it's associated interpretive text, SECE Decisions on the Rules, Traditions, Etiquette and Professional Standards of Earlwood Euchre based on the judgments of the Supreme Euchre Court of Earlwood.
March 16. The ESG&EC and Fatcat can provide the following update about their response to the COVID-19 pandemic and it's impact on current and future competitions. Both stressed that given the fluidity of the situation, all options remain on the table and they will continue to act on expert advice, with the health and safety of tipsters and golfers their paramount consideration.
ESG&EC President Davidson Love III has commissioned Professor Dick Faldo, a biosecurity and pandemic expert, to determine best practices to minimise the risk of participants being infected with the virus. The good Professor, the senior researcher at the world renowned Shearman Institute, immediately recommended all tipsters and golfers drink at least 6 schooners of Resch's draught on weekdays and plenty more on weekends.
"The medicinal qualities of a tall, cold glass of Resch's are universally recognised in the scientific community. It's known to cure chronic abscesses, tuberculosis, cholera, 'female complaints', mercurial eruptions, paralysis and even restore life in the event of sudden death so this virus should be a piece of piss. Unfortunately, for many of us, it's not a panacea for hair loss."
March 16. In respect of Fatcat's NRL tipping competition, "A Competition With A Difference", it will continue in Round 2 with the competition now closed to the general public as a preventative measure. Along with the NZ Warriors, Fatcat will relocate to Kingscliff for at least the next week however he won't be joining the Warriors at the Kingscliff Backpackers - he'll stay at the Balé complex in the Salt Beach precinct to work on the tipping competition and his suntan.
"The ESG&EC will continue to examine short and long term options to assist our golfers if May's World Series of Golf is abandoned. We would be willing to close the courses to spectators if that meant the event could go ahead. The cancellation of our most profitable event would also have catastrophic consequences not only for club's balance sheet but also for the NSW Central Coast economy. If that happened, we would be forced to seek Federal Government financial assistance," said President Love.
"I can’t stress enough that our club has never faced such challenges ... well not recently, not unless you count the Turd Round (see below) befoulment of Toukley golf course's pristine waterways last year and the subsequent unsuccessful prosecution of the club by the Environmental Protection Authority. Like then, we will do everything we can to keep our participants healthy, out of jail and our competitions strong. Frankly, an Australia without Fatcat's 'A Competition With A Difference' and the World Series of Golf is not an Australia I want to live in."
March 4. Sensing a lack of leadership aboard Royal Caribbean's Ovation of the Seas, Davidson Love and Seve Hemosteros filled the vacuum, took charge of the ship and appointed themselves roving medical wardens.
Pictured in their hazmat suits patrolling the corridors, within days of leaving Sydney the enthusiastic pair, dubbed Virus Busters by the crew, had disembarked to the lifeboats mid-ocean 327 passengers who displayed mild coronavirus symptons.
"Getting a table in the dining rooms or a seat at bingo is a lot easier now and there's still 7 days left to clear a few more passengers," said Mr Hemosteros.
February 6. Former Lewisham dux, Iditarod dog sled racer (pictured) and grand raconteur Glenn "Finn" Findlay will be stopping over in Sydney for just a few days later this month before heading north to sail The Whitsundays where he'll be scouting locations for the 2021 America's Cup.
His sole Sydney public appearance will be at Engadine Bowling Club's in the round bar, Friday February 21, from 3pm onwards where he'll perform a number of cabaret classics ("I Still Call Turton Avenue Home", "Tenterfield Musher" and a personal favourite "Quiet Please, There's A Lady Onstage" from his critically acclaimed and autobiographical Broadway musical, "The Lad from Oz".
Tickets can be purchased at the front desk when you sign in.
January 28. The week long sporting and cultural extravaganza, incorporating two sanctioned World Series events, will commence on Monday, May 18.
The club is anticipating around 16 starters for WSofG XXXII with the following venues now booked - Gosford (Monday), Wyong (Tuesday), Toukley (Thursday) and Shelly Beach (Friday).
Prospective Costa Plenti Estate residents are required to send their $200 accommodation deposit, half of which is non-refundable, to President Love's Cayman Island account by Friday, February 7 (details provided in group email January 26). The cost of a bed on the estate is expected to be $400 with the balance, once confirmed, payable early May.
The tournament entry fee is $450 and should also be preferably paid prior to the tour.
November 24, 2019. The club has released it's latest audited post-tournament accounts.
Balance Pre Match Play - $2,854.82
MP Revenue - $1,900 (17 players + 4 guests)
MP Expenses - $2,457.70 (green fees 1082, milestones 100, prizemoney 700, hospitality 575.70)
Tournament Loss - $557.70
Balance Post Match Play - $2,297.12
Davidson Love III
Club President & Auditor
August 5, 2019. The club received news this morning of the sudden death of UK-based tipster and past ESG&EC member Gary Phillips. Gaz suffered a heart attack during a social cricket match and was unable to be revived.
This is a very recent photo of Gaz (middle) borrowed from the Pudsey St Lawrence Cricket Club website (hover or tap image to enlarge). He's with brother-in-law John McGovern (hat), his niece Frances and sister, Lyn McGovern.
Our deepest condolences to Tracy and Liam on the loss of a loving husband and father and to all his family and friends.
Vale Gaz - a great friend to many on these shores.
Beercoin's listed price is underpinned by the cost of a schooner (425ml) of Resch's served in the public bar of The Entrance Hotel during the World Series of Golf (1 schooner = 1 Beercoin). In the 12 months to May 2019, Beercoin's market capitalisation rose 4.5% to $1,035. Hover or tap Beercoin image to enlarge.
These few words printed in jest on a t-shirt by an savvy and opportunistic member took an already bitter rivalry and lit a blazing fire under it.
In October 1994, Per-Ulrik Fatcatsson (Christian Brothers) battled Seve Hemosteros (Canterbury High) to the death in arguably one of the greatest games in Match Play history. It was sheer determination vs. swagger, Irish Catholic vs. Protestant, humble public servant vs. corporate heavyweight.
The outcome shocked the sporting world and it's taken nearly 25 years for the players to sit down and tell their stories.
Few of the thousands of players who make up today's multi-million dollar Earlwood Euchre industry know anything about the game's origins, nor do they pay any respect and, more importantly, dividends to it's founders.
That's about to change.
The ESG&EC, a joint custodian of the game, has engaged one of the country's greatest strategic and legal minds, Tack Nicklaus QC, to protect it's commercial interests.
He had money, butchery smarts, a reverse golf grip and became the first player to achieve the club's coveted home and away double after winning the 1990 Match Play Championship and the 2002 World Series.
So why has Tubby Waldorf been disliked so intensely, by so many, for so long? Maybe it's the much maligned Saturday morning horse tips or a wardrobe of striped shirts.
But sometimes, perception isn't reality.
He was The Beatles of golf - a charismatic, handsome and slender figure from Engadine who worked wonders with the ball and thrilled galleries wherever he went.
But Dick Faldo was also the lead in a Shakespearean tragedy fuelled by alcohol and the fading memories of old sexual conquests.
We'll talk with the neigbours who nailed a bottle opener to their wooden fence to facilitate his afternoon drinking sessions and meet the only woman from the 'Lender of Last Resort' who spurned his advances - his sister - and ask her the big question: Does she now regret that rash decision?
The streak began when he defeated hot shot 6th seed Kenny Crenshaw 3 & 1 in the Round of 16. A week later, Heckle Sunday, he beat the favoured Tubby Waldorf 2 & 1. The following Friday he saw off the well-fancied Hunter Meehan 5 & 3. In the final match he defied the odds to beat Peard Fulke 3 & 1.
Was it skill, good fortune or an old-fashioned and carefuly orchestrated betting coup that turned the perennial underdog, Bourkie Baird, into the 2013 Match Play Champion?
On December 10, 2013, Sotheby's London office auctioned off what could be considered the most important historical document in sports history - Seve Hemosteros' original World Series of Golf blueprint, drawn up at Robo Mediate's Macleay Place residence over a few drinks on Boxing Day, 1988.
This is the story of one man's fanatical quest to win back this seminal artifact at auction and bring the document home to Earlwood where Hemosteros was born and raised.
25 years after he personally witnessed the blueprint's creation, Mediate inspired a group of wealthy benefactors to dream his dream and take a few shares in a couple of greyhounds as well.
Reader discretion is recommended - this story may contain frequent coarse language.
The young viscount rescued from a post-apocalyptic Warsaw became infamous in his adopted country when, at the age of 5, the first English words he uttered both contained four-letters, one beginning with F and the other beginning with C.
Sitting for the Higher School Certificate in 1973, he could not have been any prouder when he was awarded 2 F's and 4 C's by the Board of Studies.
And nearly half a century later, it's hard to discern even the slightest expansion to the now Flemington Fruit Markets f*#klift driver's simple vocabulary. WTF*#k !!
A bold challenge, a fearless experiment and ultimately, a spectacular failure.
In 1999 a new event challenged the establishment's cosy duopoly, the World Series and Match Play Championship, but after a promising start at North Ryde and a final round at Eastlakes less than a decade later, The Presidents Cup disappeared from the ESG&EC sporting calendar.
We remember the blonde mullet, a cigarette glued to the lips and those enormous fairway splitting drives that propelled him to victory at the 1995 World Series.
We knew Big Jack Daly as much for those larrikin traits and his large dusters as for the constant drinking, womanising and swearing, mostly done off the course, that forced him into rehabilitation and a premature sporting retirement.
He's someone who played two sports professionally - golf and soccer. When speaking to others about him, I noticed something I'd never experienced before. At the mere mention of his name, people either immediately lit up in excitement or fell over laughing.
Boo Boo's story isn't really a sports story, it's a superhero story. A superhero who broke his thumb shaking hands before an over 45's game in the Sutherland Shire minor leagues and, as a result, signed on as a marquee player with Sydney FC and became the face of Nike's landmark ad campaign, "You Don't Know Boo Boo".
The following excerpts are taken from Rules of Earlwood Euchre (1973) as amended published by Earlwood Printing, a division of the ESG&EC. This text has now surpassed Hoyle's Rules of Games to become the primary and definitive reference source for players of Earlwood Euchre.